I was an imaginative child who filled my mind with stories of daring and brave men and intelligent and equally brave women.
I listened to the Everly Brothers and watched Fred Astaire movies and I’d often hear “good luck getting married if you’re expecting that” – To which I’d laugh and return promptly to my book, or put the needle right back on my record as it sang:
“Darling you can count on me,
Till the sun dries up the sea,
Until then I’ll always be,
Devoted to you…”
As a now-adult who is no less imaginative, I’m here to talk to the girl who is waiting for a relationship and thinking of compromise.
If you’ve been told that your standards are too high,
Or that your imagination is too vivid,
Or that men like you’re looking for don’t exist, Don’t don’t don’t settle.
If you’ve read stories of heroes and are starting to doubt their existence, I’m here to tell you that they’re out there. I strongly believe that God puts desires into your heart because He’s waiting to fulfill them in His time.
So dream dangerously, dear heart.
And I know what it’s like to wait. It’s awful. The doubt is awful. It’s hard to shake the constant “what’s taking God so long?” and “Is there something I should be doing?” and “Am I where God wants me?” and “Are my standards too high?”
But beloved of God, you are right where you are supposed to be.
Read that again, and believe it.
Believe that if you could better serve Christ in any place other than you are, you’d be there. Know that you’re in it for a reason – for His reason.
If you’re struggling in your waiting season today, I have to tell you that I am convinced that if you’re not fulfilled now in your singleness, you won’t be fulfilled then in your relationship.
Singleness, I urge, should be savored.
As long as there is breath in your lungs and a heart beating in your chest, you have work to do. God has you where He wants you.
If you feel alone, you should be focusing on your growth. Explore who you are – who God made you to be – and don’t compare yourself to anyone else (and that goes for both relationships and singleness).
Read a lot.
Expand your mind.
Try new hobbies.
Try getting in shape (I’m still working on that one).
Study your Bible in depth; write notes in the margins and keep a journal.
Accept opportunities with an open mind.
Sell your heart and everything you are to the God that created you and your desires.
He will grant you the desires of your heart when all of your desires are reduced to one, and I can tell you that from experience, and from the Bible (Psalm 37:4).
God has blessed me with an incredibly old-fashioned and sweet man with a fire for Him in his soul when I wasn’t even actively looking.
He seemed to have leapt straight from the pages of one of my storybooks, and I know that in all my hopeless romantic dreaming God was preparing me to meet him.
We had both spent our lives exploring what God had for us to do – and like spokes on a wheel, when we both drew close to God, we ran right into each other.
I promise you, dear sister, that if you are dreaming of and waiting for the man of your dreams, he is out there.
Don’t compromise any of your standards.
Savor your singleness.
Savor your relationship.
Savor your God.